Saturday, October 21, 2006

GOP Candidate: Kids Should Use Textbooks as Protection From Schoolhouse Gunmen

A candidate for state superintendent of education in Oklahoma has proposed a plan to protect schoolchildren from gun-related violence by putting old, thick textbooks under every school desk in the state for students to use in self-defense if a crazed gunman storms their school.

In case you're waiting for the other shoe to drop, yes, the candidate is indeed a Republican.

The GOP's own Bill Crozier believes that old schoolbooks could be used as effective shields should a gun nut begin shooting up campus and even produced a video showing how it would work. Here it is:

Crozier and some other gun-wielding Okies -- including some children! -- gathered in an open field to experiment shooting multiple weapons to see how far the bullets would penetrate various textbooks. He first tried an AK-47, only to see the bullet from that weapon go through two massive books. He then fired a Glock 9 mm pistol and the bullet did not even make it to the back cover.

"The bullet did not penetrate the book," intones the proud candidate.

Meanwhile, Crozier did not comment about how a symptom of the larger problem might actually be how a pack of backwoods Republicans were able to convene, on their own, with high-powered handguns and an assault rifle, to run their goofy little experiment.

Crozier's Democratic opponent, Sandy Garrett, had no comment on the plan.

But, under Crozier's silly proposal, the best defense might just be the hardcover edition of the book detailing all the brain-dead, NRA-endorsed Republicans running for public office.