Qualifications? We Don't Need No Steenkin' Qualifications!

If only it weren't for that pesky word "emergency" in Federal Emergency Management Agency, George W. Bush might have an easier time explaining why he considers the top positions at FEMA to be nothing more than a payoff to unqualified political cronies.

According to the New York Daily News, none of the three top dogs at FEMA appear to have any experience with, well, emergencies beyond what they may have dealt with when John Kerry was leading Bush in the polls last year.

The Daily News reports that FEMA Director Michael Brown ran horse shows in his last private-sector job, while FEMA's number two man, deputy director and chief of staff Patrick Rhode, was an advance man for the Bush-Cheney campaign.

The agency's former third-ranking official, deputy chief of staff Scott Morris, was a political media flack who worked for Maverick Media, the Texas outfit that produced TV and radio spots for the Bush-Cheney campaign. In June, Morris moved to Florida to become FEMA's long-term recovery director.

"The Bush administration has apparently transformed FEMA from a professional, world-class emergency responder into a dumping ground for former campaign staff and political hacks," said Democratic Congresswoman Carolyn Maloney of New York.

No big secret to most of us. Bush will always take care of his own – no matter how many people die as a result.